Keeping track

Not much going on in the Circle City. I'm listening to music, and obsessing over my stats on my Last.fm/Audioscrobbler page, which recently got a makeover. It's amazing how such a simple idea has kept me so amused. I'm like a cat with a piece of string. Seeing the name of the song I just listened to show up on the internet is like magic! How they do that?

I'm playing Yahoo fantasy football for the second year in a row, and my league had our draft tonight. I got a pretty decent crop of running backs this year, but I'm not as happy with my receivers. Although last year (when I finished 2nd in the league), I made a lot of important pickups once the season had already started, so I may be able to make some quick adjustments. I did spend an early pick on Adam Vinatieri, the only kicker in the league capable of winning an entire week on his own (as he did for me last year when he had a week where he kicked 3 field goals and 2 extra points and threw for a touchdown on a fake), and I'm hoping Chris Cooley will be a sleeper pick, as the Redskins seem to like to use him in the red zone. Here's my complete roster:

QB: Tom Brady, NE; Drew Brees, SD

RB: LaDanian Tomlinson, SD; Curtis Martin, NYJ; Julius Jones, DAL; Warrick Dunn, ATL

WR: Laveranues Coles, NYJ; Nate Burleson, MIN; Deion Branch, NE; Michael Clayton, TB; Jerry Porter, OAK

TE: Antonio Gates, SD; Chris Cooley, WAS

K: Adam Vinatieri, NE

DEF: Seattle

Music: At the moment, I'm listening to Ivy, a great pop rock band that's a side project of Fountains of Wayne's Adam Schlesinger, but also spawned its own side project, Paco. Lately though, my tastes have been stuck firmly in the early 90's. Lots of Matthew Sweet, Connells, Samples, Counting Crows, Jayhawks, Uncle Tupelo, and Sugar on the playlist.

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned for Sega

One of my favorite movies of all time gets the Super Deluxe treatment. Kevin Smith treats his fans well. The man knows exactly where his bread is buttered (and exactly how much he can milk from his hardcore fans with Super Deluxe editions of his back catalogue).

Um... er...

This is why it's dangerous when I get bored. Mugshot-style self-portraits, drastic haircuts... it's never pretty.

10:46 am --> 11:39 am

The F%#$ing Aristocrats

Saw The Aristocrats tonight. There's been a ton of press about how this movie features the filthiest joke ever told, and it's probably true. Basically, the deal is there's this joke that's been around since the days of Vaudeville, and comedians tell it to each other. The joke always has the same beginning and end, but the middle section allows for the comedic version of jazz improv, where the teller tries to come up with the most offensive, disgusting things he can think of, riffing on all the versions he's heard before but also trying to top them. It's always been a sort of insider thing, but Paul Provenza and Penn Jillette (of Penn & Teller) have put together a pretty impressive group of comedians and writers to provide their own spin on the joke. There are some surprises, and I won't spoil any of them, but I think my favorite scene had to be Kevin Pollak's rendition. As for the movie itself, it made me laugh a lot, but often in a kind of "Oh my god I can't believe they said that" way. The biggest irony is that the joke itself isn't really all that funny.

Oh, and by the way, if cursing or graphic descriptions of sex acts, bodily functions, incest, or bestiality ain't your thing, don't bother seeing this movie. But if it makes you offended that there's even a movie where people say these things, never fear: AMC Theaters will take care of all that thinking stuff for you. They have some nice, safe, dumbed-down movies with very little in the way of cursing (or plot) that are probably more your speed.

Miscellany

Nice weather here today (the humidity's finally gone), so it's inspired me to clean. Here's a few items I've been meaning to post:

My friend Todd used the power of the blogger to get a press pass and has been covering the Chicago Air & Water Show, which took place over the past few days in the Windy City. Because of his stellar coverage, Todd's blog, MyFlightBlog, was mentioned on The Chicagoist, a site devoted to covering events in and around Chicago.
UPDATE: The Chicagoist piece got the attention of GridSkipper, which is part of the Gawker blog family. Pretty nice exposure for "Todd".

I'm looking forward to the upcoming release of The Brothers Grimm, which appears to be another typically warped film from director Terry Gilliam. To mark his latest film, I've decided to revisit his entire filmography (or all that's available on Netflix) in chronological order: Monty Python and the Holy Grail; Jabberwocky; Time Bandits; Brazil (the director's cut, not the butchered studio version); The Adventures of Baron Von Munchausen; The Fisher King; 12 Monkeys; Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas; and finally, Lost in La Mancha, which is not technically a Gilliam film, but rather a documentary about his disastrous attempt to film a movie about Don Quixote. I decided to skip Monty Python's The Meaning of Life because Gilliam only directed a portion and not the entire film. I'm curious to see how this goes. I couldn't finish Time Bandits the first time I tried to watch it (of course, I was 13), but I loved Fisher King and 12 Monkeys.

The Ingram Futbol Club of Arkansas is trying to get the Guinness Book of World Records to recognize them for playing the longest game of soccer ever. Call me a traditionalist, but I think Guinness should stop accepting staged events like this. It's one thing if you're playing a game with unlimited overtime and it goes on that long, but when you set out to break the previous record and know exactly how long you need to go to do it, it kind of seems like cheating.

October is shaping up to be another great concert month for me. Not only do I have back-to-back nights of U2, I've now added Nickel Creek and Son Volt shows the following week. Speaking of Nickel Creek, their new album, Why Should the Fire Die?, debuted at #1 on the Independent and Internet Sales charts for the week of August 9. Paste has an interview with the trio, and positive reviews are coming in from the Nashville Scene, Dallas Morning News, Houston Chronicle, and a quickie from the Chicago Tribune.

I'm all over this. The Lord of the Rings exhibit is coming to Indy. Pretty much anything that was built, forged, sewn, or designed for the movies will be represented. I've decided to attend in street clothes, since I don't want to overshadow the actual costumes. I ain't tryin' to dis my man P. Jack. Unfortunately, not all Ringers are so respectful, so I'm expecting a crowd of hobbits and elves.

Hoosierama

Got to experience the final day of the Indiana State Fair today, partially for a work thing, and partially out of curiosity to see the rural Hoosier in full plumage. I managed to sit through the State Fair Queen pageant, largely due to the food coma I was suffering after eating a fried Twinkie, a fried Snickers bar, two fried Oreos, a fried Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, a steak sandwich, an Italian sausage, and a pineapple whip. All I can say about the pageant is, every stereotype you can imagine was represented: the idiot host; the dumb farm girl; the bleached-blonde Marilyn Monroe wannabe; the girl who loves horses; the dark horse candidate who followed the unconventional career path (in this case, welding); the not-at-all-surprising fact that the one African-American person in the entire building was not a contestant; the inane questions, and even more insipid answers. It was all there, and it made for some high comedy, but also some incredibly painful moments. After that was over, we wandered around the midway and people-watched. Strangely, I wore a t-shirt with the Superman "S" logo, and several people told me "nice shirt". Huh? Either the superhero t-shirt is somewhat of a new phenomenon in this area, or else the farm folk don't see too many comic book nerds out their way. Or maybe it was just the way my bulging muscles fill out the shirt so well. All in all, the Fair was interesting in a car-crash can't-look-away way, but I don't think I really feel the need to go back (a fact which pleases my digestive system to no end).

(Sigh)

The harsh realities of life for the American soccer fan. We are barely third-class citizens when it comes to TV.

Keeping with the soccer theme: usually, the theatrics come from the players.

If you were in junior high or high school at any point during the 80's, you will appreciate Freaks & Geeks. You knew these guys (or you were them, in some of our cases). Do yourself a favor and rent the DVDs. Once you've finished with high school, move on to college with Undeclared, from the same creators and almost as good. Not surprisingly, neither show lasted a full season because the networks needed to free up a time slot for Surviving the Amazing Surreal Queer Factor Apprentice of the Real Biggest Loser Rules, or whatever the current crap-ass flavor of the reality week was at the time.

I've got a fever, and the only cure is...

Christopher Walken for President? Finally, a candidate worthy of my vote. Sadly, this website is a joke. But even The Washington Post likes the idea. I mean seriously, who wouldn't vote for a candidate who could use "This Country Needs More Cowbell" as his campaign slogan?

Music: The Magic Numbers. Still no US release date, so I broke down and bought an import version. Worth the extra $6. Last time I mentioned them, I compared them to the B-52's, but the only similarity is that they have one male and two female vocalists. There's plenty of other influences evident in this disc: Violent Femmes, Rilo Kiley, Matthew Sweet. The entire album is a collection of well-crafted pop songs, and the three-part harmonies add another layer that lots of current records are missing. Basically, if you took a bunch of 70's AM radio-style pop and added 60's girl group vocals, you'd be getting close. Definitely an enjoyable listen.
Video: "Love Me Like You", their current UK single.

I like poster books. I like Star Wars. Therefore, this is my new favorite book. See kids, all those deductive reasoning questions on your SATs can be applied to the real world.

What I've Learned...

With apologies to Esquire, here's a few random thoughts that I've been mulling over for the past few days...

• Playing football on XBox is not a substitute for real exercise. Unfortunately, I usually remind myself of this fact after coming home from work and playing for three hours, by which time it's already too dark to go running.
• Jalapeños. Yum. Ouch. But yum.
• Just when you think you might have women figured out, they go and do something that blows it all up again.
• Despite the rep for being less-complicated, guys are usually just as hard to figure out as women.
• Movies are better as a shared experience. But the movie theater is not your damn living room, so stop acting like it.
• As long as people keep making music, I'll keep buying it. I don't think I'll ever reach a point when I say, "That's it. I own enough music."
• Being drunk and stoned at the same time is never a good mix.
• I will patronize any establishment that makes good cheese enchiladas.
• Live music is a pretty powerful thing, regardless of whether it's performed in an outdoor amphitheater for thousands of fans or in a living room for one person.
• Not much can top a good nap. Unless it involves scantily-clad women and hot fudge.
• Becoming comfortable with yourself is a huge step towards adulthood. Since I embraced my nerdhood, I've been a lot more content with my life.
• I'm a firm believer in the whole "laughter is the best medicine" thing. If you meet somebody who makes you laugh, keep them close.
• A wise man once said to me, "Pizza is like sex. Even when it's bad, it's good." Actually, he used to say that a lot.
• You could have the greatest job in the world, and you'd still find something to complain about.
• If it's worth fighting for, fight. Otherwise, you'll be 80 years old, looking back on a long list of regrets.
• The hardest-rocking band in the world features a grown man in a schoolboy uniform, proving once again that growing up is overrated.
• Sometimes I wish I knew everything. But then life would probably be really boring.

A second chance

After seeing the first half of the Colts-Bills game last night with a few co-workers (great seats, total yawner of a game), we adjourned to Casa de Leister to watch Napoleon Dynamite. I saw it once in the theater and wasn't as impressed as a lot of people, but I decided to give it another chance since everyone in the freakin' world continues to spout quotes from the movie on a daily basis. As it turns out, I did think it was funnier this time, in part because it was nice to hear the quotes in their original context instead of coming from somebody at the office. It's just a silly and random movie, and I still feel like it tries a little too hard. The parts with his family are a lot funnier to me than most of the school scenes. But it's also a lot more enjoyable when you're watching it with somebody who's giggling uncontrollably through most of the movie. It's hard not to laugh too.

MLS: Another game, another 3-0 win for DC United. Even missing a lot of their offensive starters and playing in scorching humid DC heat, they rolled over expansion club Chivas USA. Santino Quaranta continued his recent string of impressive games, and Dema Kovalenko, Jamil Walker, and rookie defender Bobby Boswell extended their point streaks as DC stretched their unbeaten streak to 6 with their 4th straight win. I almost felt bad for Chivas at some points, but then I remembered when their owner, Jorge Vergara, was talking before the season about how Chivas (the sister club of a Mexican League team) would come in and own MLS right away. My favorite part of the game? Hanging in front of the Screaming Eagles supporter section was a banner that read: "Us-4 cups. You-3 wins."

Music: Although I've been listening mostly to Coldplay since Friday night's concert, I also downloaded the remastered version of AC/DC's classic album Back in Black, mainly because after so much mellow Brit music, I was feeling the need to rock very loudly. I am happy to report that I still remember how to play the opening riff to "Hell's Bells" after a 15-year break. If there was an emoticon for the devil horns, I would totally throw them now.